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If there’s one word I’d use to describe my wife and I’s approach to family life, it would be intentional. We’re certainly not perfect—far from it—and we lose our patience more often than we’d like to admit, but we care deeply about the kind of home we’re building together. We’ve never wanted to just drift through life, letting the culture around us or the busyness of the calendar decide what our family should be. Instead, we’ve tried (imperfectly) to step back, ask hard questions, and design a family life that reflects our actual values, not just our default habits.
This isn’t about striving for some picture-perfect version of family life that only exists on social media. In fact, it’s almost the opposite. It’s about getting honest about what really matters to us—things like showing up for each other, making space for rest and play, and keeping faith, creativity, and laughter at the center of our home. And it’s about making sure that our daily choices, from how we spend our weekends to how we handle conflict, actually support those values. It’s a work in progress, but every small step we take helps us feel more connected, more purposeful, and honestly, just happier as a family.’
Make time for regular family check-ins
When life gets busy, it’s easy to operate on autopilot, each family member rushing through their own schedule. A regular family check-in is a simple way to pause and ask, “How’s everyone doing?” This could be a Sunday evening tradition or a monthly breakfast date where you sit down together and talk about what’s working in family life—and what’s not. Are mornings stressful? Is there enough time for fun? Are the kids feeling heard? These conversations don’t have to be serious or long, but they do create a space where every voice matters, and that’s a powerful step toward intentional living.
Create a family vision statement
Just like successful businesses have mission statements, intentional families benefit from a clear sense of purpose. Sit down together and brainstorm: What’s most important to us as a family? What do we want our home to feel like? What kind of people do we want to become together? Distill your answers into a simple statement like, “We are a family that values curiosity, kindness, and laughter.” Hang it somewhere visible so it becomes part of your daily culture. Over time, this statement becomes a compass that helps you navigate decisions—both big and small.
Prioritize family rituals and traditions
It’s tempting to think that only holidays deserve traditions, but some of the best family rituals are the small, everyday ones. Friday night pizza, weekend pancake breakfasts, bedtime stories, or Sunday afternoon walks—these are the moments kids will remember most. Rituals provide stability and a sense of belonging, especially during life’s challenging seasons. They also remind your family (and yourself!) that joy and connection deserve space in your schedule, no matter how busy life gets.
Be clear about your “family no’s”
Living intentionally isn’t just about adding good things; it’s also about knowing what to subtract. What drains your family’s energy? What commitments pull you away from your values? Decide ahead of time where your family’s boundaries lie. Maybe you say no to back-to-back extracurriculars so you have time for slow evenings at home. Maybe you say no to activities that pull your family apart every weekend. Whatever it is, knowing your “no’s” protects space for your bigger “yes.”
Define your family’s core values
Core values are the foundation of intentional living. If your family doesn’t know what you stand for, it’s easy to get pulled in every direction. Spend some time identifying your top 3-5 values as a family. Maybe kindness, creativity, generosity, or faith. Once you know them, you can filter decisions through those values—whether you’re planning vacations, choosing extracurriculars, or deciding how to spend money. When values drive decisions, your family life starts to reflect what really matters to you.
Practice gratitude as a family
Gratitude changes the way families experience daily life. It helps you focus on what’s right instead of what’s wrong. A simple gratitude practice can be as casual as sharing one “high point” of the day at dinner or keeping a shared gratitude jar where family members can drop in notes about things they’re thankful for. Gratitude doesn’t erase challenges, but it does help families develop a habit of noticing the good, even in imperfect moments.
Create technology-free zones
Screens have a sneaky way of stealing attention away from each other, even when you’re all in the same room. Setting up technology-free zones—like the dinner table, the car, or the first hour after school—helps protect your most valuable family moments. It’s not about banning screens entirely; it’s about carving out space where eye contact, conversation, and creativity can thrive without constant interruptions. Over time, these screen-free spaces become safe zones for connection.
Be intentional about how you spend weekends
Weekends often become a catch-all for errands, sports practices, and leftover to-do’s, but they’re also a prime opportunity for family bonding. Instead of letting weekends slip by, plan them with intention. Maybe you dedicate Saturday mornings to adventure—hikes, bike rides, or exploring new places. Maybe Sunday afternoons are for family movie marathons or creative projects. The goal isn’t to fill the calendar but to design weekends that reflect your values and create memories worth keeping.
Celebrate small wins together
Most families celebrate birthdays and holidays, but intentional families find reasons to celebrate the small stuff too. Did your child show courage trying something new? Did a sibling offer unexpected kindness? Did your family stick to a new habit for a whole week? Call it out! Celebrate with an ice cream run, a family dance party, or just some verbal praise at dinner. These moments of recognition reinforce the kind of behaviors and choices your family wants to cultivate—and they make everyday life feel a little more special.
Model intentional living as parents
The most powerful lessons you teach your kids won’t come from lectures—they’ll come from watching you live. If you want to raise kids who value intentional living, let them see you doing it. Talk about why you’re choosing to say no to overcommitment or why you’re prioritizing family dinner. Share your own dreams and values with your kids, and invite them to hold you accountable when life gets busy. When parents walk the talk, intentional living becomes more than a theory—it becomes your family’s culture.
Want to start small? Choose just one or two tips to try this month and see how they shape your family life. Intentionality isn’t about perfection; it’s about paying attention to how you spend your time, energy, and love—and making sure it all lines up with what matters most. Which of these feels like the right fit for your family right now? Let’s start there!
